Zack & Hannah’s Visit Pt. 2

Day 4 – Ben, Mario and a Fatty B

I’m sure we all woke up a little groggy. We were getting an early start.

The plan was to hike Ben Lomond, which was a challenging uphill climb with variable weather conditions. First thing, we went to DOC to check on the status and get some details.

I think we were all questioning it. I was worried about my knee on the way down and they were hesitant about the temperature and grade. The response we got from the ranger was, “It snowed up there a few days ago so it’ll be slushy. You’ll have to take care where you put your feet in certain sections because there’s a quick drop off.”

It wasn’t necessarily a vote of confidence. The unspoken consensus I was picking up was that we weren’t going to the summit.

The compromise we made was to ride the gondola up (skipping the first part of the track) and go for as long as we were comfortable. We’d luge afterward since that was at the top of the gondola anyway and then call it a day.

We went back to prep lunches and snacks and got ready to go.

The gondola ride up was nice. At the top was an exceptional view of Queenstown.

Queenstown from the Gondola Lookout

There was definitely a difference in temperature just where we were. I think motivation was low group-wide but we started the walk.

It was a decent grade at first; not too terrible. Hannah commented early on that it was already better than she thought it’d be. Then what was a gradual ascension began to get more intense.

About 20 minutes in there was a sign noting the saddle was 1.5hrs and the summit was 2.5hrs. So a 5hr return. It didn’t seem in the cards.

As we continued, they fell behind me at a few stages. What I didn’t know was that they were already calling off the summit while talking amongst themselves.

We made decent time getting to the saddle and had a snack. Looking at the peak from where we were did seem ominous. A persons’s silhouette was the size of an ant on the ridgeline. Kind of sweet though.

Up the Saddle Toward the Summit

We decided that we might as well keep going for now.

The last leg of the climb was obviously going to be the most difficult. To add to the challenge, the wind decided to start whipping. Chilly gusts of 20-30mph that we were leaning into.

At some point, the trail got muddled with wash outs. We were rock hopping and doing switchbacks.

Hannah shot out of a cannon. Whether it was anger at the cold or the morning coffee taking full effect, she crushed the final ascent.

Before we knew it, we’d hiked Ben Lomond. The altitude is 5,150 ft, of which we climbed 3300+ft. It felt like a special accomplishment. And shortly after arriving, we got our reward in the form of mint chocolates from a very kind Japanese man. He bowed many times.

The view was worth it. There was a dude up there in shorts somehow. Cruising. Said he could see his house. Props. He mentioned something about “l’appel du vide,” the French term for “the call of the void.” Like there’s a voice in the back of your mind when being at heights like this that tells you to jump.

I was like nah, but I might get blown off by this wind and try to ride it all the way to the bottom.

On the way down, the wind conveniently shut off. No surprise there. We ate our lunch at the saddle and pressed on.

I’m not sure how long it took us in total, but we took a deserved rest when we got back to the gondola station.

We got a classic line from Hannah after a little while of sitting at a table outside.

“My legs are cold. Zack, can you put your legs on my legs?”

-Hannah Chartouni

I can safely say I’d never heard that request before. Now I can tick it off the list.

Before it was time to take our gondola ride down to the ground, we had luge tickets to use.

It was basically like real life Mario Kart without the weapons. It looked kind of cheesy as we watched people go by, but it was actually really fun trying to get as much speed as possible. There were some sweet downhills and curves in there. We got 5 runs and took a very scenic chairlift up to the start each time. We were all pretty happy with how the day turned out.

Fat Badgers Pizza

Back at street level, it was time to satisfy the appetites we’d worked up. We went to a place called Fat Badgers where Zack and I got a massive pizza, wings and a beer and it was pretty much lights out after that.

Solid accomplishments.

Day 5 – Kind of Shotunder, Actually

It was rafting day and I was hyped. It was also a great day for it. The weather was pristine.

Based on my previous rafting experience in New Zealand, this was going to be sick. It was also another level up. We’d be on class 4 and 5 rapids in the same sweet as canyon where I did the swing and zip line. Stoked.

The downside was that they didn’t allow personal cameras for safety reasons. Based on the videos they were playing in the office, it did actually look pretty gnarly. The river was running higher than normal so it was going to be churning.

They said that they weren’t operating a few days ago because of the water level and also told us that at least one boat was flipping every day.

Scandalous.

Another exciting detail about this trip was that to get to the drop in, we’d be on one of the worlds top 10 most dangerous roads.

Skippers Canyon Rd. – *This is not my image. No copyright intended.

Seeing it in person was crucial. Our driver had steel testicles, that’s for sure. I would’ve nope’d out hard in a regular vehicle, yet here he was maneuvering a bus full of people with a trailer full of rafts behind it. 

We’re talking about a one lane (generous), winding dirt road that’s high as shit with no guard rails. And there was another vehicle + a bulldozer trying to come the opposite way at two points. Crazy.

In any event, we made it safely where we needed to. For the driving portion at least.

At the launch point, we got our final safety briefing and our boat assignment. We were paired up with 3 employees from the company who were kayak guides. So basically our raft was mean as hell. We were the lead boat down the river because of how sick we were. That is not factual, but a safe assumption per my unskilled observation.

The early stage of the Shotover river was pretty smooth sailing. There were a few class 2 and 3 rapids but nothing too gnarly. There was also a spot where we got to jump out for a swim. Pretty frigid river but when in Rome.

It was kind of surprising when we got to the halfway point. We’d only conquered a handful of rapids so far and nothing that intense. We were at the chief section though.

Our guide gave us the run down and we went full steam ahead. There were 6 rapids in pretty quick succession. After powering through the first 2, we had to pull over and tie up to be on safety watch for the other rafts going down. This was good practice, but we had to do it repeatedly and each time was like 10-15 minutes long. It really interrupted the flow of the trip. It seemed a bit overly cautious, so we were all wondering if there’d been some kind of major accident.

The rapids in the chief section were pretty extreme and definitely gave me a rush. It would’ve been nice to run them back to back to really feel it. Our guide said our line was perfect and then admitted it was a redemption run for him because his raft flipped the day before. Clutch. Also, smart to withhold that info until afterward.

The big finale of the ride was going through a 200m tunnel (super sweet and unique) right out onto the last rapid, “Cascade,” which was a 7m drop.

That was a fun spell. I actually thought the drop was going to be crazier but it was all good.

At the end, me, Zack and Hannah talked it over. We were a little underwhelmed overall. In total we were on the river for about 2hrs but 30 minutes or more was spent pulled over waiting. There were only around 12-15 rapids in all over that whole time. Plus, they didn’t allow GoPros and didn’t take any pictures of their own, which was a service they said they provided. Mildly disappointing not having any evidence of the journey. For me at least, the Tongariro rafting was a better experience in even though the rapids were smaller. One man’s jaded opinion.

Bandana Bros

Back in town, we found some lunch and ate by the water. There was no rush. We had a 2.5hr drive to Te Anau but nothing planned for the evening.

On the way, we stopped at Amisfield Winery which had a good reputation. We were comically underdressed but still got a tasting. Another solid Pinot Noir. Z&H enjoyed a glass as we chilled outside on their sweet ass patio.

I also forgot how nice the drive out of Queenstown was. Whoever planned the roads wrapping along the mountains right next to the water was smart. I suppose that’s the easiest way to do it, but I still appreciate it.

Car Napping Like a Boss

After a bit of chatting and some more car naps, we got to Te Anau. We topped up our groceries in preparation for our trip to Milford the next day. Then we went to check into the hostel. I was staying in a dorm the first night and then we were all staying together the second night.

That’s how it was supposed to be.

During preparation, our plans moved around a little bit and in redoing the reservation, I made it for the wrong day like a dummy. Oops. I had a feeling about it earlier in the day too.

There was no vacancy at any of the affordable places in town either. Screwed the pooch. Thankfully, Z&H let me stay on the floor in their room.

It was an early wake up call too — our shuttle was leaving at 6:30am the next day.

Zack & Hannah’s Visit Pt. 1

I waited at the rental car counter for an hour. I was anxious because I had to drive back to the city to get my bags and then back out to the airport to scoop my people. They were already delayed a few hours so I couldn’t be late.

I was told the car was ready over the phone so didn’t expect such a long wait. Should’ve known. It seemed like the place only hired 12 year old blonde girls. I don’t necessarily have a problem with that as long as there’s enough on staff to see to the high volume of customers.

I got it, got my bags and got Zack and Hannah from the airport. Then we were off.

Our itinerary was pretty well planned out. At least our evening destinations were all booked, as well as a few excursions.

Our Loop Around New Zealand

Day 1  – Driving to Twizel

It was about a 4hr drive from Christchurch to Twizel (‘i’ as a ‘y’ sound).

The best part was coming over a hill to see Lake Tekapo with Mt. Cook and a few others in the background.

Lake Tekapo and Mt. Cook

We found a scenic lookout to pull over and snap some photos.

“It’s gonna be a gudday, mate.”

-Zack McDowell

And it was. We picked up some groceries for dinner and the next few days.

We were staying at an AirBnB that turned out to be epic. It was set up to be a ski lodge for a large group. Seemed a bit wasted on the 3 of us but no matter. We made a nice dinner and took advantage of the fire place and comfy sofas. Funny to think that we were probably knocking out our nicest accommodation on the first night. Oh well.

Z&H stayed up late enough for us to enjoy the digs (and hopefully avoid any major jet lag).

Day 2 – Our First Hike and the Drive to Wanaka

I left my shampoo behind. End of the highlights. (Wordplay)

Nah. We made a decent breakfast and packed up.

It was a 45 minute lakeside drive out to Mt. Cook. We were doing the Hooker Valley Track, which was an easy 3hr walk. I had found it on a top 10 list of things to do on the South Island. Boom. Poles and rain jackets were at the ready.

It was another well-kept track, but definitely the most crowded I’d walked in NZ.

Zack & Hannah at Mueller Lake

Mt. Cook was used as Mordor in Lord of the Rings and you could definitely see it. It was a gloomy day and the damp greenery combined with murky water made for a dramatic setting.

Even with the heavy dose of picture breaks, we made it back to the car in 3 hours. We gobbled down lunch and hit the road again. Off to Wanaka.

We had some good car conversation before Zack and Hannah dozed off. This would become a recurring theme. I will acquire photos.

The thing about New Zealand is, there are some stretches of road without a service station for a while. I knew this and had already had a low fuel scare so I was looking to play it safe.

Shortly into our drive we passed a small town and a sign that had distances for a mountain pass and the next two townships we’d be passing. No problem. There’s gotta be another small place with fuel before the climb up the pass.

Spoilers: There wasn’t.

After we’d gone about 30km and most of the way up Lindis Pass, the fuel light came on.

Not again, you dummy. Playing it safe usually means being overly cautious. So by ‘safe,’ I meant living on the edge.

I waited a bit for the other two to wake up. I didn’t want to worry them, but at some point I’d have to come clean.

We were all holding our breath. I coasted down the mountain so hard. I was acting like the gas pedal didn’t exist. Camper vans and trucks were whizzing past us.

We got down the mountain and kept hoping the next town would be around every corner.

Spoilers: It wasn’t.

There weren’t even signs updating us on how much farther we had to go. I was sure we’d be sputtering to a halt and flagging someone down any minute. The math in my head was telling me we’d gone almost 80km to whatever town was on the last sign.

Finally, we saw a community center. Where there’s enough civilization to warrant a community center, surely there must also be petrol. Shortly up the road we got to the country store that had it. Insane! No doubt we were rolling up on fumes.

Of course we had to go through the whole rigmarole of the payment station not accepting our cards. The clerk was closing up shop but allowed us to use her card in exchange for cash. I still don’t know why foreign cards don’t work at those things.

Either way, the important part is that we got our desperation gas and were able to carry on relatively unscathed.

By the time we got to Wanaka it was raining pretty heavily. Conditions made the tree in the lake a bit less picturesque, unfortunately.

After a brief stop to see it, we went to settle in and clean up at our respective hostels.

We had enough time to get to Rhyme & Reason Brewery before they closed. Zack enjoyed a tasting tray and ended up buying a bottle. Then we had to solve the age old dilemma of where to eat dinner. We ended up picking The Federal Diner, which was hidden down an alley way but likely the best meal we had the whole trip. Spirits were high. It was a good night and we were ready for the next adventure.

I was on the way back to my hostel when I got a message from Ellen, the Swedish lass I met up with back in Picton. She was also in Wanaka and looking for something to do.

I joined her for a walk around the town, which was silent. After chatting for a while, I invited her to join us on our activities the following day and through to Queenstown. She was interested and said she’d let me know.

Before bed, I got a message saying she was in.

Day 3 – Diamond Lake, Free Wine and onto Queenstown

We convened for breakfast in the morning. I quickly learned how important coffee is to Zack and Hannah’s daily routine. They got the goods.

Next, we went to the i-Site to sort out which walk we were going to do. There were so many in the area that it was difficult to decide.

Once we had our plan of attack we picked up Ellen. The track was just a short drive out of town so getting there was quick. We got a good start and the walk was awesome.

Another 3 hour track – Diamond Lake to Rocky Mountain Summit. There was a little bit of a climb but nothing too serious. There were several viewpoints looking back toward Wanaka over the lake and land. Rather spectacular for how little we worked for it.

On our way out, we stopped at Rippon Vineyards. It was supposed to have good wine and awesome views, which it did. They were setting up for a wedding though. The venue price for this place must’ve been a pretty penny. I mean, seriously. The tasting room was still open, however, and the wine tasting was free/donation-based…toight.

Rippon Vineyard

Pinot Noir is the main grape grown in the Otago region. That worked because in the rare event that I’m drinking wine over beer, I do prefer reds. They did have this one that was a rare white grape that barely anybody in the world produces – Osteiner, I think. The bartender said that it was cheap but it might’ve been my favorite. No surprise with my simple palate.

After taking in the wine and the views, we ate lunch on the grounds. We literally sat on the ground and made sandwiches. Then we drove through to Queenstown.

Zack was geeking out on the approach. To be fair, driving through Frankton is extremely pretty with the way the houses are stacked up onto Lake Wakatipu.

We dropped Ellen off at her hostel and checked into ours. It was nice getting there in the late afternoon so we had some time to wander around.

I’d been around Queenstown enough during my previous visit to act as a de facto tour guide.

Tacos on a Boat

We got some delicious tacos and ate them on a floating boat bar. Zack geeked out again — I believe saying it was the coolest thing he’s ever done? Don’t get me wrong, Perky’s is moored right on the water in the middle of the city. The views were pretty exceptional. But, the fact that the boat had a bathroom on board took it over the top for Zack.

We were getting into a really good pocket of conversation when two young, insanely drunk local dudes came up and forced themselves onto our table.

One of them was somehow Brazilian, Japanese and Kiwi…with purple hair. We weren’t really sure how to parse that all out but he did a lot of talking and clearly had the whole world figured out. Told us some tale of his friend getting stabbed with a screwdriver.

The other guy was incoherent, from Punjab and dropped my camera.

It was an agonizing and endless waiting game for them to finish their drinks and move on. Somehow, we all endured and told them we were heading back to our rooms.

I checked my camera and noticed the viewfinder was no longer focusing. That really capped off the encounter. I later found out there was a diode I could adjust to dial it back in to be usable.

In the moment though, we were all bitter. That ignited a spark to go for another beverage.

We met up with Ellen at a western-themed bar called Cowboys, mainly because they had tabletop shuffleboard.

That dumbass experience was still in the back of my mind, plus karaoke was happening which was grating. Although the guys were killing it, honestly. One dude did like a 3-song set of 90s rap — “No Diggity” being the highlight.

We crushed some games and beers and moved onto another bar that I knew had cheap drinks. It just so happened that the terribles were also there. Thankfully they were too drunk to notice us so we skated by and had a few more beverages.

To end the night, we got Fergburger. It’s a Queenstown institution that usually has an insane line all the time. We got there and felt it was destiny because there wasn’t one. I heard a local walk past and say “Never seen that before,” in her amazing accent.

It’s tough to conclude whether the burgers are amazing or not under the circumstances. Regardless, it hit the spot and was a good way to conclude the evening.

The next day we had a summit to tackle. Depending.