I waited at the rental car counter for an hour. I was anxious because I had to drive back to the city to get my bags and then back out to the airport to scoop my people. They were already delayed a few hours so I couldn’t be late.
I was told the car was ready over the phone so didn’t expect such a long wait. Should’ve known. It seemed like the place only hired 12 year old blonde girls. I don’t necessarily have a problem with that as long as there’s enough on staff to see to the high volume of customers.
I got it, got my bags and got Zack and Hannah from the airport. Then we were off.
Our itinerary was pretty well planned out. At least our evening destinations were all booked, as well as a few excursions.
Day 1 – Driving to Twizel
It was about a 4hr drive from Christchurch to Twizel (‘i’ as a ‘y’ sound).
The best part was coming over a hill to see Lake Tekapo with Mt. Cook and a few others in the background.
We found a scenic lookout to pull over and snap some photos.
“It’s gonna be a gudday, mate.”
-Zack McDowell
And it was. We picked up some groceries for dinner and the next few days.
We were staying at an AirBnB that turned out to be epic. It was set up to be a ski lodge for a large group. Seemed a bit wasted on the 3 of us but no matter. We made a nice dinner and took advantage of the fire place and comfy sofas. Funny to think that we were probably knocking out our nicest accommodation on the first night. Oh well.
Z&H stayed up late enough for us to enjoy the digs (and hopefully avoid any major jet lag).
Day 2 – Our First Hike and the Drive to Wanaka
I left my shampoo behind. End of the highlights. (Wordplay)
Nah. We made a decent breakfast and packed up.
It was a 45 minute lakeside drive out to Mt. Cook. We were doing the Hooker Valley Track, which was an easy 3hr walk. I had found it on a top 10 list of things to do on the South Island. Boom. Poles and rain jackets were at the ready.
It was another well-kept track, but definitely the most crowded I’d walked in NZ.
Mt. Cook was used as Mordor in Lord of the Rings and you could definitely see it. It was a gloomy day and the damp greenery combined with murky water made for a dramatic setting.
Hooker Lake 
Mt. Cook 
Swing Bridge
Even with the heavy dose of picture breaks, we made it back to the car in 3 hours. We gobbled down lunch and hit the road again. Off to Wanaka.
We had some good car conversation before Zack and Hannah dozed off. This would become a recurring theme. I will acquire photos.
The thing about New Zealand is, there are some stretches of road without a service station for a while. I knew this and had already had a low fuel scare so I was looking to play it safe.
Shortly into our drive we passed a small town and a sign that had distances for a mountain pass and the next two townships we’d be passing. No problem. There’s gotta be another small place with fuel before the climb up the pass.
Spoilers: There wasn’t.
After we’d gone about 30km and most of the way up Lindis Pass, the fuel light came on.
Not again, you dummy. Playing it safe usually means being overly cautious. So by ‘safe,’ I meant living on the edge.
I waited a bit for the other two to wake up. I didn’t want to worry them, but at some point I’d have to come clean.
We were all holding our breath. I coasted down the mountain so hard. I was acting like the gas pedal didn’t exist. Camper vans and trucks were whizzing past us.
We got down the mountain and kept hoping the next town would be around every corner.
Spoilers: It wasn’t.
There weren’t even signs updating us on how much farther we had to go. I was sure we’d be sputtering to a halt and flagging someone down any minute. The math in my head was telling me we’d gone almost 80km to whatever town was on the last sign.
Finally, we saw a community center. Where there’s enough civilization to warrant a community center, surely there must also be petrol. Shortly up the road we got to the country store that had it. Insane! No doubt we were rolling up on fumes.
Of course we had to go through the whole rigmarole of the payment station not accepting our cards. The clerk was closing up shop but allowed us to use her card in exchange for cash. I still don’t know why foreign cards don’t work at those things.
Either way, the important part is that we got our desperation gas and were able to carry on relatively unscathed.
By the time we got to Wanaka it was raining pretty heavily. Conditions made the tree in the lake a bit less picturesque, unfortunately.
After a brief stop to see it, we went to settle in and clean up at our respective hostels.
We had enough time to get to Rhyme & Reason Brewery before they closed. Zack enjoyed a tasting tray and ended up buying a bottle. Then we had to solve the age old dilemma of where to eat dinner. We ended up picking The Federal Diner, which was hidden down an alley way but likely the best meal we had the whole trip. Spirits were high. It was a good night and we were ready for the next adventure.
Rhyme & Reason Brewery 
The Federal Diner
I was on the way back to my hostel when I got a message from Ellen, the Swedish lass I met up with back in Picton. She was also in Wanaka and looking for something to do.
I joined her for a walk around the town, which was silent. After chatting for a while, I invited her to join us on our activities the following day and through to Queenstown. She was interested and said she’d let me know.
Before bed, I got a message saying she was in.
Day 3 – Diamond Lake, Free Wine and onto Queenstown
We convened for breakfast in the morning. I quickly learned how important coffee is to Zack and Hannah’s daily routine. They got the goods.
Next, we went to the i-Site to sort out which walk we were going to do. There were so many in the area that it was difficult to decide.
Once we had our plan of attack we picked up Ellen. The track was just a short drive out of town so getting there was quick. We got a good start and the walk was awesome.
Another 3 hour track – Diamond Lake to Rocky Mountain Summit. There was a little bit of a climb but nothing too serious. There were several viewpoints looking back toward Wanaka over the lake and land. Rather spectacular for how little we worked for it.
Behold Wanaka 
A Man & His View 
Tools of Ascension 
Contemplative Hannah
On our way out, we stopped at Rippon Vineyards. It was supposed to have good wine and awesome views, which it did. They were setting up for a wedding though. The venue price for this place must’ve been a pretty penny. I mean, seriously. The tasting room was still open, however, and the wine tasting was free/donation-based…toight.
Pinot Noir is the main grape grown in the Otago region. That worked because in the rare event that I’m drinking wine over beer, I do prefer reds. They did have this one that was a rare white grape that barely anybody in the world produces – Osteiner, I think. The bartender said that it was cheap but it might’ve been my favorite. No surprise with my simple palate.
After taking in the wine and the views, we ate lunch on the grounds. We literally sat on the ground and made sandwiches. Then we drove through to Queenstown.
Zack was geeking out on the approach. To be fair, driving through Frankton is extremely pretty with the way the houses are stacked up onto Lake Wakatipu.
We dropped Ellen off at her hostel and checked into ours. It was nice getting there in the late afternoon so we had some time to wander around.
I’d been around Queenstown enough during my previous visit to act as a de facto tour guide.
We got some delicious tacos and ate them on a floating boat bar. Zack geeked out again — I believe saying it was the coolest thing he’s ever done? Don’t get me wrong, Perky’s is moored right on the water in the middle of the city. The views were pretty exceptional. But, the fact that the boat had a bathroom on board took it over the top for Zack.
We were getting into a really good pocket of conversation when two young, insanely drunk local dudes came up and forced themselves onto our table.
One of them was somehow Brazilian, Japanese and Kiwi…with purple hair. We weren’t really sure how to parse that all out but he did a lot of talking and clearly had the whole world figured out. Told us some tale of his friend getting stabbed with a screwdriver.
The other guy was incoherent, from Punjab and dropped my camera.
It was an agonizing and endless waiting game for them to finish their drinks and move on. Somehow, we all endured and told them we were heading back to our rooms.
I checked my camera and noticed the viewfinder was no longer focusing. That really capped off the encounter. I later found out there was a diode I could adjust to dial it back in to be usable.
In the moment though, we were all bitter. That ignited a spark to go for another beverage.
We met up with Ellen at a western-themed bar called Cowboys, mainly because they had tabletop shuffleboard.
That dumbass experience was still in the back of my mind, plus karaoke was happening which was grating. Although the guys were killing it, honestly. One dude did like a 3-song set of 90s rap — “No Diggity” being the highlight.
We crushed some games and beers and moved onto another bar that I knew had cheap drinks. It just so happened that the terribles were also there. Thankfully they were too drunk to notice us so we skated by and had a few more beverages.
To end the night, we got Fergburger. It’s a Queenstown institution that usually has an insane line all the time. We got there and felt it was destiny because there wasn’t one. I heard a local walk past and say “Never seen that before,” in her amazing accent.
It’s tough to conclude whether the burgers are amazing or not under the circumstances. Regardless, it hit the spot and was a good way to conclude the evening.
The next day we had a summit to tackle. Depending.