AirBnB Archives - Burning the Map

January 6, 2020January 5, 2020

Rock the Kasbah

It’s a 1980s song where the lyrics are often mistaken. It’s a 2010s film I’ve never seen. In 2019, I did my own rocking in Morocco. The first time I’d set foot on African soil. Will it be the last? Keep reading.

My friend Jud and I decided that we wanted to link up and explore the wonders of this North African country. I’d heard friends rave about it. Contrarily, while in Europe, I’d heard incredibly poor reviews. Still, it seemed like it was worth taking the chance.

I landed in Marrakech about 3 days ahead of Jud, so I had a chance to familiarize myself with the customs and surroundings. As with many, if not all, of the poorer countries in the world, cash is king. When I arrived, I planned to get some in the airport. I retrieved my bag and noticed just about everyone exchanging money at a single, very central currency counter. I searched for an ATM without any luck and decided to follow suit with the rest of the crowd. FYI – brutal conversion and service fees. There are plenty of cash machines in the city, which I’m sure charge far less per withdrawal. Since my goal was to take a local bus into downtown, I needed it right away, unfortunately.

That plan was a somewhat wild ordeal. No surprise, even in early November, Morocco is hot. I walked about 15 minutes in the baking sun to the bus stop. I was trusting Google Maps even though it had a warning about uncertain schedules. The warning was accurate. I waited there for what seemed like over an hour. Many, many other buses came and went. Just when I was going to surrender for a taxi, the L20 arrived. I was without question the only white person on board. I ignored and/or smiled politely to the onslaught of stares.

A mere 30 minutes later, I was dropped off outside the southern wall of the medina. That’s what a “kasbah” (“casbah” in English) is by the way — an old city or fortress.

I walked among the cramped, often dead-end streets before I found my hostel for the next few nights. The check-in process was interesting as there was no formal reception and no one to greet me for several minutes. That being said, there was a cool vibe with 3 floors surrounding an open-air courtyard with rooftop hangout areas as well. The 2 proprietors took time to sit down and chat with me about life as well as some pointers about the main attractions.

After a shower to wash the 20+ hours of travel off, I did a cursory walk around the main square. It was a blistering cacophony of…just about everything.

Motorbikes weaving around cars that barely had enough space to traverse the streets.
Mosques.
Walls within walls.
Snake charmers.
Juice vendors.
Handcraft stalls and pushy shirt-sellers.
Plenty of barber shops.
And let’s not forget shawarma.

I was mainly prepared for orange facades and the mix of French and Arabic culture. It was a lot more than that. I grabbed some food from a small eatery and headed back to the hostel to digest this first impression.

There wasn’t enough time to take a 2-3 day excursion out into the Sahara, so I booked a day trip to the Ourika Valley instead. The itinerary was super appealing on paper, so I had decent expectations. It promised a visit to a Berber village, a look at how Argan oil and handcrafts are made, as well as a trek to a waterfall and a camel ride.

It was mostly a let down. Everything was a crowded tourist trap, nature walk included. The camel ride especially was disappointing. The boys were lasso’d to one another, and it was just a 10-15 minute walk next to a main road. The village built into the mountain was sweet to gaze at from afar, but I’m not sure it was enough to save the day. Still, it was $45 USD (including tip for the guide) so at least it was affordable.

That basically brings us to Jud’s arrival. Our Moroccan adventure was essentially split into four parts based on where we spent our time.

MARRAKECH (PT. II)

Jud was more or less my sugar daddy on this trip — covering the AirBnBs and some other transportation costs.

We met up at the first accommodation in the north medina, which was somewhat difficult to find even with a map and specific instructions. Thank the lord for their very specific blue front door.

Even though he had been traveling for 20+ hrs with no sleep, we decided to go for a wander. I was familiar with some of the souks and the main square but that’s about it.

After some time weaving through the maze, we were approached by a “friend” who “just wanted to practice his English.” Many of the vendors and street goers are aggressive in getting your attention. It wasn’t a surprise. But this guy implanted himself into our walk, since “his house was the same way we were going.” Once he brought up taking us to a tannery, I knew it was a scam. An elaborate one.

The thing is, a tannery at its peak definitely looks worth a visit. I’ve seen some enticing photos, this dude even showed us one. The reality was not the same.

I tried explaining what would happen to Jud since I was almost wrapped up in the same scam a few days before. I thought we would arrive and be able to leave at the entrance. Our guy was in the midst of handing us off to his pal, the friendly tannery tour guide, when I asked how much it would cost. “Don’t worry about price,” he said (as if it was a dumb question). Jud and the guide continued ahead as I walked dejected, 30ft behind. It was a very uncomfortable feeling.

The place was in absolute shambles. It was apparently the last day of its operation for the next while. But we “had to see it” because “the Berber people are down from the mountains” and “only for today.”

The shallow pools used to color animal hides, normally filled with a beautiful array of bright tones, were completely brown and smelly. The dredges of mud and pigeon shit used to seal the stain. It was abysmal.

A 5 minute spiel ended and we were shepherded to a shop that sold the completed goods. Yet another handoff, this time to a salesperson. After we clearly weren’t interested in buying anything they let us leave. The first two guys magically appeared a few steps away from the shop and asked us to pay them for their services. An argument ensued from my end since I was never told the price. It wasn’t a good look, but I was careful not to be taken advantage of. Since Jud is a stand up guy, he paid them something to leave us alone.

Be warned: if you’re ever in Marrakech, don’t accept a tannery tour from anyone other than an agency or your accommodation.

On our walk back to the AirBnB we had to fend off another guy pining for money for trying to show us the way even though we didn’t need him and he didn’t know where he was going. That left me with a sour impression of Marrakech. I mean, I guess you can’t blame them for trying to make money, but honesty when prompted is kind of the decent thing to do.

The next day we made our own tour of some main attractions. First we visited a very disappointing tomb. It was a 40 minute line to see an intricately tiled room for a handful of seconds. Then, we went to a place called Bahia Palace which was built in the 19th century by the head of government. I didn’t realize it at the time, but the main courtyard was surrounded by 12 rooms, used by his 24 concubines. An incredibly detailed place, with carved molding and ceramic designs aplenty. Afterward, we checked out the highly regarded Secret Garden. It was nicely manicured, though I couldn’t help but think that it was only championed because it was a refuge of greenery in the middle of the desert.

So 1 success out of 3 made for an unimpressive day out. However, we finished it off with a rooftop sunset, a liter of beer and some shawarma.

A mistake was made somewhere along the way in terms of street meats eaten because that night was the beginning of a few rough days for the butthole. Another lesson learned.

Personally, I was happy to bid farewell to the hectic ambush of Marrakech for something more relaxed. The following day, Jud and I boarded a bus bound for “the blue city.”

ESSOUIRA

We enjoyed a pleasant yet windy walk along the coast to reach the medina. There was significantly less people and a lot more open space. Our AirBnB host walked us up a few flights of narrow stairs to reach his flat. He showed us our room and the excellent rooftop eating area where we would later watch the sunset.

It was early evening, so we got a restaurant recommendation and took a casual stroll. The wind was bitter after the sun was too low to pierce the slender streets. Jud and I made a wildly unnecessary, in-person reservation considering we were the only people in the place for the first 20 minutes of our meal. A pair of girls (Dutch and American) were eventually seated with us and we chatted for over an hour. I was continually distracted by what was going on with my insides that I didn’t eat or contribute much.

We parted company somewhere in the chilly avenues of the old city and returned to our a accommodation. That night, I nearly oozed the bed, which I’m assuming is a brand new sentence. I roughed it through until morning and turned to a medicinal solution.

It was a low-key start to the day. Breakfast overlooking the sea, no big deal. Afterward we strolled around the port which was bustling with vendors and gulls hoping for fish scraps. We were walking along the top of the sea wall when a rogue wave crashed over the rocks, completely soaking Jud. It was possibly the most direct hit the ocean has ever made. Somehow, I was lucky and only got a little salt water mist on my camera.

Once Jud changed into dryer clothes, we explored more of the city streets and gates. We saw the 18th century cannons and people making handcrafts.

We roamed the beachside path outside the medina for quite a while. There were kitesurfers, ATVs, and camel rides happening even though it was largely deserted. I wondered how different the vibe would be if it was more lively. Perhaps the wind was a deterrent. Strong gales whipped us back from time to time, took my hat for a ride once, and created an invisible sheet of sand that peppered our faces. We took refuge on a tree-lined cafe patio to have lunch.

That evening, after soaking in the sunset, we tried a traditional Moroccan restaurant. It looked upscale based on the fancy table dressings and golden wall decor. However, the entrance was awkward considering basically everyone looked up from their dishes to stare at us. We had the good fortune of sitting side by side facing them, so that was fun. The food was solid though, so we left happy despite having spectators for every bite.

The remainder of the evening was uneventful. We woke up for another rooftop breakfast and then caught a bus back to Marrakech to snag a train to Casablanca.

CASABLANCA

It seemed like nobody had anything good to say about Casablanca. “It’s a very industrial place.” “There’s nothing interesting to do there.” “Meh.”

I guess we should have listened.

The AirBnB was super nice, with lovely hosts, but the city left something to be desired. It was the most sprawling, but the least interesting in terms of visuals. There were some newer buildings under construction, but no consistent theme.

Apologies for this unimaginative section. The absence of descriptive writing reflects the blandness of the location.

We made our own walking tour to look at the purported interesting architecture. An old post office and bank, several hotels, and then some more banks. It didn’t offer enough to get my camera out of the backpack. “Meh.”

Even the medina was dull. Maybe it was the path we took, but there seemed to be very few remnants of history and alluring sights. We followed a boring street for a while until we got to Rick’s Cafe. Again, my expectations were different from reality. It was sandwiched between two other buildings and had a security guard out front. It appeared rather new and lacked any sort of unique 1940s vibe. I mean, the design was inspired by the movie, but that was difficult to ascertain from the exterior. The interior probably did a better job but since we didn’t want to get gouged by steep beer prices we passed.

Instead, we made our way along the water to check out the world’s third biggest mosque — Hassan II — an ominous sight, with a low layer of fog hugging the building. The minaret is the second largest in the world, so that had no problem sticking out of the translucent white blanket. Unfortunately, we were there at a weird time so we missed out on taking a tour of the inside. It was still by far the most interesting attraction we saw on our journey around the city.

(As a caveat, we didn’t visit La Corniche, which is apparently the beachy area where “the golden youth” hangs out. The nightlife was supposed to be decent there, but I’ll have to give that a shot on another trip.)

RABAT

Since we were unimpressed with Casablanca, we spontaneously decided to take a day trip to Rabat, which was a short train ride up the coast. It turned into a very worthwhile audible because it was easily the coolest place we encountered across our entire Moroccan adventure.

The main city had a slightly modern European vibe in terms of the layout and architecture. We made our way through the medina quickly until we reached the kasbah nestled on the mouth of an inlet. Inside, there were beautiful alleys of white and blue houses from around the 12th century. It would have been an awesome place to get lost in for a few hours. However, some guy took us on an unwanted 20 minute tour, whisking us through the place before requesting a ridiculous amount of money. A 2 hour walking tour in any major European city has more information and costs a quarter of what this guy was trying to charge. It was the only downside to the entire excursion.

Once we left his company, we found a free art museum inside a gorgeous palace courtyard. Then, we took a jaunt by the water and had lunch on a nice cafe patio.

From there, we made a gigantic loop around the freshly constructed part of the city until we wound up back at the train station.

Rabat had the potential to be a great 2-3 day destination, if only we had known beforehand.

On our last day, we took a train back to Marrakech and then a taxi to the airport. Jud disappeared through security in the early afternoon but my flight didn’t depart until around 7am the next morning. I made a quick trip back into the city to spend the rest of my dirham on some decent Christmas gifts. I rearranged my luggage for another 20+ hours of travel and stayed up chatting with friends until I was able to go to my gate.

Due to the lack of sleep and new destination excitement, I left my laptop smushed between bins at the security checkpoint. Surprisingly, I didn’t panic when I noticed hours later.

Thanks to a random travel mate connection, I was able to get it recovered. It was a painful and expensive process receiving it in Mexico, but now it’s back in my possession. Hooray! I’m going to blame that ordeal for the tiny abyss between posts.

Next I’ll have a summary of Morocco as well as a big look at my European leg. Hopefully sooner than later. Stay tuned!

June 26, 2019June 26, 2019

Beer, with a Side of Music and Culture

When did we first get to Brussels? The end of May. Wow. Can’t believe it’s been that long already.

Andrew and I got off our bus and met up with a few people at the AirBnB where our group of 15 would call home for the weekend. It was a very eccentric place. There were a lot of mannequins and old time knickknacks everywhere. Interesting decor choices for sure.

Jud and his band mates arrived a few hours later. After a few beers at the apartment, we went out to find some food at Hip Square, a semi-central hangout place with a bunch of restaurants and bars surrounding Saint Catherine’s cathedral. It was a popular spot, with tables and people spilling out into the cobblestone area. As it was still light out until almost 11pm, we stayed there for a while before heading back.

A few of us hung out in the sketchy street catching up when the final group of festival goers arrived. Time went on and we eventually got chastised for making too much noise so we turned in.

The band were first to leave in the morning and then our clan of 9 got breakfast and caught the train out to Zottegam. We disembarked, and had a 30 minute trek through the small town. As we were walking, Erin and I ran into an older gentlemen who was curious where we were from. He was a resident who was sometimes a guest professor at UVA. It really is a small world. We continued down some neighborhood streets and dissected a few wheat fields before finally ending up at Dunk!Festival.

We had about 6 hours to spend between the main stage and the forest stage until Gifts From Enola played. It was a small festival but a pretty cosy setup. The band did an interview for the local radio station and then had fans coming up to them saying very complimentary things. One guy from Spain said they changed his life and got him into the entire post rock genre of music. A loyal follower since the MySpace days. Incredible on all accounts.

When it came time for them to play, it was epic. The sound was solid, the performance was great and the light show was ridiculously on point. Really good crowd turnout and support as well. I felt proud to know them. Unfortunately we had to hurry out to catch the last train back to Brussels without being able to congratulate the band. They were able to stay overnight and enjoy themselves.

The next day our group of misfits started with a Belgian waffle and had an impromptu tour of a few notable city sights — Grand Place and Manneken Pis to be specific. The little boy peeing is really little. He was dressed up for us though, which is something.

We hung out in a park until we were joined by Gifts. After a few hours chilling, we wandered back to Hip Square and split our time between a few different seafood restaurants and beer joints. Brown bars are a Belgian staple — kind of a dive bar, but known for their old wooden construction, dim light and smelly toilets. This wording comes from a city map, but I can verify. The insane thing is each beer was served in a specialized, branded glass for that particular beverage. At every bar. That’s dedication. And an 8.5% tripel was €3.80, which would’ve easily been $8 in the US. Sauce.

The following morning, the group separated into smaller factions and departed for different destinations. Andrew and I hung out with the band until the afternoon as they were the last to leave.

Once we said our goodbyes, we caught the metro down to the southwest part of the city and did a self-guided tour of Cantillon, a 100+ year old brewery using open air fermentation to make lambics. Read: more Belgian beer. Then we returned to the city center and walked around for a bit. We had some insane sandwich called a mitraillette for dinner (hamburger + fries on a baguette), a sweet waffle for dessert, and ended with a flaming absinthe shot at Delirium Village.

Andrew’s flight back to Richmond was the following afternoon — a sad departure. We had an awesome time clowning around. It would’ve been awesome to keep it rolling for another week. Or indefinitely. Whichever.

I spent the subsequent days catching up on some things and trying to arrange my future plans.

I was lucky to meet two generous girls, Amanda (a Canadian working in Belgium) and Aline (a Belgian, well, living in Belgium). Look at you helping me out, Tinder.

I hung out with Amanda a few times, mostly just working and chatting. We went out for a meal of signature Belgian dishes once. I had the Flemish stew, which was ballin. It also happened to be a place that served this beer where the recipe had been lost for 200 some years, so that was a bonus. She charged the entire dinner to her company as well. Extra bonus.

Aline and I met for a few beers one night and got late night frites. She very kindly welcomed me to couchsurf at her place for a few days, a helpful break for my travel finances. Very lucky situation. We watched some movies and the Women’s World Cup and snacked. One night, we went to watch a band at a microbrewery. Beer again. She was fun and open to hosting me longer, but her twin sister was returning from a year and a half abroad, so I thought they should have a chance to spend some time together.

This inspired me to take a 3 day trip to Ghent. It was a short train ride away. A very medieval, historical city that was active from the university there. I went on an evening walking tour my first night to get a bit of the backstory and significance of some landmarks. I learned that Ghent, through Charles V, was basically in control of almost all of Western Europe in the 1500s. Though a lot of the buildings were from that era, most of their facades had been refurbished sometime during the 20th century. Still, there was a castle, several cathedrals and an infamous bell tower which all looked outstanding.

The weather ended up being miserable for my last two days there, but I got a 48-hour city pass to grant me access to the cultural places. I visited two of the art museums, the design museum, the industry museum where they showcase the history of their textile and graphic design processes. I got a bird’s eye view of the city from the top of the Belfort and was able to scope The Mystic Lamb in St. Bavo Cathedral, which is the most stolen piece of art in the world. Unfortunately, I was a few minutes too late to enter the castle, and I missed out on the boat ride due to rain. I crammed a good amount of activities into the two days though. Definitely made the pass worth it.

Overall, my Belgian experience was largely a tour of beer, with a bit of music and culture sprinkled in. Bruges and Antwerp will have to wait until next time.

After Ghent, I went back to Amsterdam to stay with Joyce, who I met in Bali. I wasn’t exactly sure how long it was going to be but I was hoping to stretch it until the 25th of June. I ended up falling into another lucky situation. Through her amazing group of friends, I was hooked up with an apartment and a bike of my own for an entire week.

So, over the course of the 11 days, there was a lot of cycling, an after party with perfect vibes, a free canal cruise, a basketball tournament, a Couchsurfing meet up, and more general exploration. If this is the way my travels go for the next few months, I might have to quit while I’m ahead. Way ahead.

I’m trying to pinpoint what the universe is balancing out with this run of good fortune. There was that one scam in Bali. But I’m not sure if that was horrific enough to warrant this amount of positive action. Or, maybe it’s house money and I’m due for some bad luck in the future. I’m not going to be that pessimistic. I’ll just accept that things are working out for me right now and continue to ride the wave.

January 13, 2019January 13, 2019

Surfers Paradise & Brisbane

Even though I was only about 70km away from Byron Bay, I was in a new state and time zone. Queensland.

I didn’t do much research on this spot but I was able to find an AirBnB that was like half the price of all the hostels over the New Years period.

I found out why when I got to the house. I was in a shared room, which was just two mattresses on the floor. The kitchen was a mess, there wasn’t really any fridge space, there were…5 Brazilians living there and there was only one bathroom. Plus the place was hot as shit without any air conditioning.

I was intending to relax at the place but the amenities weren’t really all that pleasant. There was decent internet which was a silver lining.

One cool thing about Surfers Paradise is that there was water everywhere. There were a ton of random islands and inlets weaving all over the place.

I met up with Karalee (20yo Canadian), a fellow traveler I connected with on a FB Backpacker group. She was dogsitting for a family friend in a sweet house a block away from the beach.

We walked around the town and boardwalk while eventually formulating a plan for New Years Eve. There was a small group of other travelers from the same FB group that were interested in getting together too.

Everybody assembled at pool for a BBQ and hangout. I was the elder statesmen of the crew, which felt kinda weird. The next in line was a 25yo guy from India, then a 23yo German guy, 21 and 20yo German girls and Karalee.

Really pleasant people though. The mood was light and friendly. We had good conversation, took a dip in the hot tub and grilled up some sausages. Nobody was hitting the booze hard or anything. I actually got a 6-pack of Goose Island IPA to have that familiar taste of home.

As it got closer to midnight, we changed venues to Karalee’s place so we were closer to the beach for midnight. We marveled at the dog and played the Australian version of Cards Against Humanity to kill some time. The youngest German girl crushed us all, even with the language barrier.

We got out onto the beach and prepared for midnight. We were in one of the first time zones to ring in the new year. There was a decent fireworks show over the ocean. After the show, the group shared a few lessons learned from 2018 and some goals for 2019.

It ended up getting whittled down to just me and Karalee at some point. We posted up under a blanket on the beach and took a short nap before waking up for the sunrise. That was a somewhat popular idea as there were a decent amount of other people scattered along the beach. A few dudes even went for a chilly swim.

It was close to 7am by the time I got back to Casa de Brazil. All of the tenants seemed to be away so I zonked out for a while and pretty much did nothing until I had to catch a bus up to Brisbane the following day.

Brissy, Brissy, Brissy can’t you see?

It was time for another Workaway. The house was in a suburb about 40 minutes via public transport outside of downtown.

I was greeted by Lozz, the very gregarious host. There was also a pretty Colombian Workawayer, Carolina, that arrived a little bit before me.

Lozz walked us through the basic everyday tasks and was very loose and informal about any other stuff we had to do.

Our daily charge was to walk the dog, look after the chickens and tidy up the pool area. We had a few other random tasks here and there but nothing extreme.

Carolina and I tackled pretty much everything together. We also cooked some super solid vegetarian meals, as that was everybody else’s dietary preference. The chili tofu tortillas we whipped up were pretty dope.

I was helping her with English and she was sharing miscellaneous Spanish phrases with me.

We all got on very well. It was one of those situations where everybody felt immediately comfortable and familiar with each other. Lozz was so appreciative and positive about everything we did. Her kids, Ryan and Bri (30s), were cut from the same cloth as well. Just awesome people; really bright and energetic.

As far as exploring went, there was a day where I went to a Koala Sanctuary. The koalas (which are large marsupials and not bears) usually sleep for 20 hours a day but I showed up at the right time because the staff was changing out the eucalyptus leaves which meant feeding time. They were up and moving around which was cool to see. Super cute little things munching away. I also got to pet a kangaroo finally. And I was stared down hard by an emu. Unnerving.

I bussed downtown to wander around the city center and a few of the good suburbs. I went to the Gallery of Modern Art which was neat. My kind of museum.

In the evening, I met up with Jonathan, the guy I did Abel Tasman with back in NZ, and we did a touch of brewery hopping.

A few days later, I did a quick 40 minute walk up to the Mount Coot-tha summit, right by the house. Then I walked a few other suburbs, explored a park, checked out the artificial beach in the city and gave a few other beers a try.

Brisbane has a few unique things to offer that some other Australian cities don’t. It might not be as hip as Melbourne, or have as much going on as Sydney, but it still seemed like a good spot to be.

I was actually a bit sad to be leaving. I totally could’ve kept with the vibe and the people for longer.

Next up on the agenda was something tasty though. I was heading north to do a 3 day excursion on Fraser Island followed by a 2 day sailing trip around the Whitsundays.

December 18, 2018December 16, 2018

Zack & Hannah’s Visit Pt. 3

Day 6 – 1 in 100 in Milford

We forgot to buy coffee at the grocery store. This was a grievous error.

We were out of bed by 6am, on the bus out to Milford Sound by 6:30am and Zack and Hannah were caffeineless. Danger.

The drive out was actually pretty hilarious because they took like 4 separate naps.

Ethan, our driver, was giving us a commentary on the ride and they missed the majority of that.

We were extremely lucky with the weather we were getting though. We made a pit stop at Mirror Lakes because the conditions were perfect. Such still water, the reflection was pristine.

We also passed by Lake Gunn, which looked even better. Unfortunately, we didn’t stop. I regret not asking him to pull over. It would’ve been an epic picture as the water was reflecting the snow-capped mountains in perfect symmetry. The golden light of the morning also gave an amazing contrast to the blue of the sky and the white of the snow. Man, what a scene.

Next, we pulled off to the side of the road where there was a Kea waiting for us. A kea is an alpine parrot species that’s become a somewhat pesky critter since tourists have been feeding them. They’re pretty cute the way they hop around though.

This one was familiar with Ethan apparently. It greeted everyone kindly, apart from Zack. It didn’t like the cut of his jib I guess and ended up biting his toe. Lolz.

This did not have a lasting effect on Zack as he went back to sleep when we boarded the van again.

After another 20-30 minutes drive we got to Deep Water Basin, where our kayak trip was launching.

Two consecutive days on the water was going to be epic. And the weather was even better than the previous day somehow. That’s really saying something because they get like 200 some days of rain in Milford Sound.

We met our guide, Mossimo, and got outfitted with gear.

The good news: GoPros would be in action.
The bad news: the sandflies were absolutely everywhere and eating us to bits.

Once we were on the water it was alright but it was straight brutal beforehand.

Everybody else was coupled up, so I got paired with the only other single person – a girl from Slovakia named Makayla. Our boat fucking killed it too. I was steering in the back and we were in perfect synch. A decent amount of our day was spent waiting for some of the stragglers to catch up.

The water was abnormally calm for the first part of the day and the scenery was epic. It really was a redemption song from my first experience.

About an hour into the paddling, Hannah seemed like she was hitting a wall. Hunger and a lack of coffee was getting the better of her. I looked over at one point and she was draped over the kayak. Seemed dead.

It was a little bit of a stop and start situation again because there was one couple that was always lagging behind. We also had to cross a few boat channels which meant rounding up the group. Honestly, in terms of distance we didn’t make it all that far into the sound. If given the opportunity, I think Makayla and I could’ve seen a decent amount more.

As the afternoon went on, the wind picked up and the water got more choppy.

The rocky beach where we had lunch was an awesome spot though. Hannah was happy once she satisfied the food and caffeine-shaped hole in her stomach.

For as beautiful as the scenery was, the sandflies were nearly intolerable during lunch. I think they’re particularly fond of Western blood because Zack and I were getting demolished. They really should’ve supplied some spray.

Our spot was quickly disappearing as the tide was coming in so we finished eating and got back out there. It wasn’t too far to paddle back to base.

Before we went to shore Mossimo told us the Maori legend of how Milford Sound was created. Kind of a fun tale if you care to read it.

I really enjoyed our time on the water. I’m a big fan of kayaking and rafting in general. With this scenery too, it was hard to be mad.

We shed our gear and then Ethan picked us up to drive us back to Te Anau. We made a few other brief stops on the return.

The Road to Te Anau
Lake Gunn in the Afternoon
The Chasm

It was a long day of being out but a sweet experience. With the extra stops and guiding, we felt like we got more than we paid for which was cool. Ethan did pretty well on tips too, so we joked that the beers were on him.

When we got back, we checked into our new room together (with a bed for me!) and showered up.

We ventured out into the burgeoning metropolis of Te Anau for a meal. Of course, we ran into Ethan at the restaurant. There was a wait for a table so he invited us to join him and a Swedish guy who was on his tour the day before us.

Amazing happenstance. Getting to know both of them was hilarious.

Ethan was like 24 but had been a sponsored BMXer, the skipper of a Marlin charter boat and a gold miner in Canada. He was also a ladies man with some comical stories. For example, he told us how he had a crush on this girl but ended up hooking up with her Mom when he was younger. Those days are apparently behind him now. He said he was ready to settle down and find a long-term relationship.

“Yeah. I’m the kind of guy you can bring home to Mom…Please bring me home to your Mom.”
-Nate Impersonating Ethan

Peter was a behavioral scientist for animals, working at various zoos and sometimes traveling the world as a keynote speaker.

We went to the “hip” bar for a final round. Ethan responsibly left first since he had another tour in the morning and then we parted ways with Peter. Another great evening.

Day 7 – The Imbalanced Ratio of Driving vs Stopping

We weren’t in a hurry in the morning, but we knew we had a long time on the road.

Our plan was to do what I had done a week prior and drive south through the Catlins to see some of the sights on our way to Dunedin. Only this time without the flooding.

It was roughly 5hrs of driving, not including stops. We had the key ones picked out.

After breakfast, we pushed off on our first leg of the trip — a somewhat plain drive through Invercargill (stop to pee) and onto Curio Bay.

Three hours later, we had arrived. Unfortunately, we couldn’t see any of the wildlife around but it was a solid vista. It was only a brief stop before we were onto the next.

Then after another 45 minutes and some car sickness, we made it to our second stop — Purakaunui Falls. It was a short walk to one of the more unique ones I’ve seen.

It was about another hour or so to Nugget Point. We had a solid chat about the healthcare system in America before we arrived.

It was a 40 minute return walk to the lighthouse that had some unique cone-shaped rocks just off the coast.

Got back in the car. Roughly another hour long drive to Dunedin.
Pit stopped near Balclutha to refuel and pee.
Some more car naps.
I was fading.
Bland scenery? Unusual for New Zealand. At least we didn’t have to ford any floods.
It felt a lot later than it was.

At long last, we entered the Dunedin city limits.

We stayed outside of the city center at an AirBnB that was situated on a hill overlooking everything. It had a pretty awesome view.

The host was out when we arrived so we let ourselves in and got comfortable.

There was a debate on whether we should just make food and relax there or venture into the city.

The energy level was low.

I tried to encourage going to see some sites since they might never be back. That won out in the end and we had a pretty awesome dinner, featuring tasty pasta dishes and a full liter of wine. A full liter.

We met our host briefly when we returned. It was basically to set up our breakfast time for the morning.

Day 8 – The Swan Song

The Airbnb reviews really talked up Georgina (the host).

She provided some muesli and toast for us. She was definitely the chatty grandmother type. I think we left like a good 30-45 minutes later than we would have since she got on a roll.

It was good. Apart from the drunk shitheads in Queenstown and playboy Ethan, Zack and Hannah hadn’t had much of a chance to connect with a local.

She made some recommendations of places to stop on our drive up to Christchurch. It was another long day in the car. We had to get back at a certain point to drop off the rental as well.

We did pull off to see the Moeraki Rocks, do a quick drive by of the Oamaru steampunk museum and grab lunch but I don’t remember too much else.

Car naps? Oh, mos definitely.

We made it to our final destination a little before 4pm. We hustled to unload our things so we could knock out the airport excursion and get into Christchurch to explore.

Again, the 12 year old girls took a while to process our return (we’ve come full circle) but it got done and we caught the bus downtown.

I showed them the main highlights I’d seen – New Regent St, Cathedral Square, the Bridge of Remembrance and a few of the shopping streets.

We went to an “upmarket food court,” as a shop owner described it, for dinner. It was a large building with a ton of tasty looking restaurants all side by side.

I went HAAM on my last meal in New Zealand. A huge plate of seafood fried rice, some sushi and a big boy beer.

We decided it’d be a nice trip finale to go have a drink at one of the cool spots we’d seen on New Regent St.

We chose The Last Word, which looked like a vibey whisky bar. After a drink there, we were like why the hell not and went to The Institution across the street. They were both divey bars with a good selection and fun decor.

We had a comfy time on some couches finishing that beverage. Then the question of what we were doing next came up. Well damn. I’m usually not one to derail a night out but I had to leave a 4am to head to the airport. It was already 10:30pm and I still had to repack my things. The intelligent part of my brain said we should probably go back. I was up for whatever, so let the other two decide.

Hannah felt like staying out so we went back to The Last Word to have the last word.

I just thought of that.

I’m glad we did. Zack and I got in a giggle fit about how introverts could meet other introverts and get in a relationship without saying anything to one another.

It was an excellent way to finish off our time together, and my trip as a whole.

We Uber’d back to our…hotel room? It was a unique, boutique type accommodation with a bit of a weird vibe if I’m being honest.

The three of us destroyed our room rearranging all of our belongings. We said our fond farewells.

I got less than 2 hours of sleep. Thankfully, I woke up to my alarm and met my taxi.

After 3 months of living in New Zealand, I hopped on a 6am flight to Australia.

I was leaving what had become familiar territory to start a new chapter of this travel adventure. Mixed feelings that I’m only just now processing.

The incredible thing, is that I somehow only ended up with this single 10¢ coin.

I’d say my experience was worth a whole lot more, but an overall rating of 10 wouldn’t be too far off.

December 16, 2018December 16, 2018

Zack & Hannah’s Visit Pt. 1

I waited at the rental car counter for an hour. I was anxious because I had to drive back to the city to get my bags and then back out to the airport to scoop my people. They were already delayed a few hours so I couldn’t be late.

I was told the car was ready over the phone so didn’t expect such a long wait. Should’ve known. It seemed like the place only hired 12 year old blonde girls. I don’t necessarily have a problem with that as long as there’s enough on staff to see to the high volume of customers.

I got it, got my bags and got Zack and Hannah from the airport. Then we were off.

Our itinerary was pretty well planned out. At least our evening destinations were all booked, as well as a few excursions.

Day 1 – Driving to Twizel

It was about a 4hr drive from Christchurch to Twizel (‘i’ as a ‘y’ sound).

The best part was coming over a hill to see Lake Tekapo with Mt. Cook and a few others in the background.

We found a scenic lookout to pull over and snap some photos.

“It’s gonna be a gudday, mate.”
-Zack McDowell

And it was. We picked up some groceries for dinner and the next few days.

We were staying at an AirBnB that turned out to be epic. It was set up to be a ski lodge for a large group. Seemed a bit wasted on the 3 of us but no matter. We made a nice dinner and took advantage of the fire place and comfy sofas. Funny to think that we were probably knocking out our nicest accommodation on the first night. Oh well.

Z&H stayed up late enough for us to enjoy the digs (and hopefully avoid any major jet lag).

Day 2 – Our First Hike and the Drive to Wanaka

I left my shampoo behind. End of the highlights. (Wordplay)

Nah. We made a decent breakfast and packed up.

It was a 45 minute lakeside drive out to Mt. Cook. We were doing the Hooker Valley Track, which was an easy 3hr walk. I had found it on a top 10 list of things to do on the South Island. Boom. Poles and rain jackets were at the ready.

It was another well-kept track, but definitely the most crowded I’d walked in NZ.

Mt. Cook was used as Mordor in Lord of the Rings and you could definitely see it. It was a gloomy day and the damp greenery combined with murky water made for a dramatic setting.

Hooker Lake
Mt. Cook
Swing Bridge

Even with the heavy dose of picture breaks, we made it back to the car in 3 hours. We gobbled down lunch and hit the road again. Off to Wanaka.

We had some good car conversation before Zack and Hannah dozed off. This would become a recurring theme. I will acquire photos.

The thing about New Zealand is, there are some stretches of road without a service station for a while. I knew this and had already had a low fuel scare so I was looking to play it safe.

Shortly into our drive we passed a small town and a sign that had distances for a mountain pass and the next two townships we’d be passing. No problem. There’s gotta be another small place with fuel before the climb up the pass.

Spoilers: There wasn’t.

After we’d gone about 30km and most of the way up Lindis Pass, the fuel light came on.

Not again, you dummy. Playing it safe usually means being overly cautious. So by ‘safe,’ I meant living on the edge.

I waited a bit for the other two to wake up. I didn’t want to worry them, but at some point I’d have to come clean.

We were all holding our breath. I coasted down the mountain so hard. I was acting like the gas pedal didn’t exist. Camper vans and trucks were whizzing past us.

We got down the mountain and kept hoping the next town would be around every corner.

Spoilers: It wasn’t.

There weren’t even signs updating us on how much farther we had to go. I was sure we’d be sputtering to a halt and flagging someone down any minute. The math in my head was telling me we’d gone almost 80km to whatever town was on the last sign.

Finally, we saw a community center. Where there’s enough civilization to warrant a community center, surely there must also be petrol. Shortly up the road we got to the country store that had it. Insane! No doubt we were rolling up on fumes.

Of course we had to go through the whole rigmarole of the payment station not accepting our cards. The clerk was closing up shop but allowed us to use her card in exchange for cash. I still don’t know why foreign cards don’t work at those things.

Either way, the important part is that we got our desperation gas and were able to carry on relatively unscathed.

By the time we got to Wanaka it was raining pretty heavily. Conditions made the tree in the lake a bit less picturesque, unfortunately.

After a brief stop to see it, we went to settle in and clean up at our respective hostels.

We had enough time to get to Rhyme & Reason Brewery before they closed. Zack enjoyed a tasting tray and ended up buying a bottle. Then we had to solve the age old dilemma of where to eat dinner. We ended up picking The Federal Diner, which was hidden down an alley way but likely the best meal we had the whole trip. Spirits were high. It was a good night and we were ready for the next adventure.

Rhyme & Reason Brewery
The Federal Diner

I was on the way back to my hostel when I got a message from Ellen, the Swedish lass I met up with back in Picton. She was also in Wanaka and looking for something to do.

I joined her for a walk around the town, which was silent. After chatting for a while, I invited her to join us on our activities the following day and through to Queenstown. She was interested and said she’d let me know.

Before bed, I got a message saying she was in.

Day 3 – Diamond Lake, Free Wine and onto Queenstown

We convened for breakfast in the morning. I quickly learned how important coffee is to Zack and Hannah’s daily routine. They got the goods.

Next, we went to the i-Site to sort out which walk we were going to do. There were so many in the area that it was difficult to decide.

Once we had our plan of attack we picked up Ellen. The track was just a short drive out of town so getting there was quick. We got a good start and the walk was awesome.

Another 3 hour track – Diamond Lake to Rocky Mountain Summit. There was a little bit of a climb but nothing too serious. There were several viewpoints looking back toward Wanaka over the lake and land. Rather spectacular for how little we worked for it.

Behold Wanaka
A Man & His View
Tools of Ascension
Contemplative Hannah

On our way out, we stopped at Rippon Vineyards. It was supposed to have good wine and awesome views, which it did. They were setting up for a wedding though. The venue price for this place must’ve been a pretty penny. I mean, seriously. The tasting room was still open, however, and the wine tasting was free/donation-based…toight.

Pinot Noir is the main grape grown in the Otago region. That worked because in the rare event that I’m drinking wine over beer, I do prefer reds. They did have this one that was a rare white grape that barely anybody in the world produces – Osteiner, I think. The bartender said that it was cheap but it might’ve been my favorite. No surprise with my simple palate.

After taking in the wine and the views, we ate lunch on the grounds. We literally sat on the ground and made sandwiches. Then we drove through to Queenstown.

Zack was geeking out on the approach. To be fair, driving through Frankton is extremely pretty with the way the houses are stacked up onto Lake Wakatipu.

We dropped Ellen off at her hostel and checked into ours. It was nice getting there in the late afternoon so we had some time to wander around.

I’d been around Queenstown enough during my previous visit to act as a de facto tour guide.

We got some delicious tacos and ate them on a floating boat bar. Zack geeked out again — I believe saying it was the coolest thing he’s ever done? Don’t get me wrong, Perky’s is moored right on the water in the middle of the city. The views were pretty exceptional. But, the fact that the boat had a bathroom on board took it over the top for Zack.

We were getting into a really good pocket of conversation when two young, insanely drunk local dudes came up and forced themselves onto our table.

One of them was somehow Brazilian, Japanese and Kiwi…with purple hair. We weren’t really sure how to parse that all out but he did a lot of talking and clearly had the whole world figured out. Told us some tale of his friend getting stabbed with a screwdriver.

The other guy was incoherent, from Punjab and dropped my camera.

It was an agonizing and endless waiting game for them to finish their drinks and move on. Somehow, we all endured and told them we were heading back to our rooms.

I checked my camera and noticed the viewfinder was no longer focusing. That really capped off the encounter. I later found out there was a diode I could adjust to dial it back in to be usable.

In the moment though, we were all bitter. That ignited a spark to go for another beverage.

We met up with Ellen at a western-themed bar called Cowboys, mainly because they had tabletop shuffleboard.

That dumbass experience was still in the back of my mind, plus karaoke was happening which was grating. Although the guys were killing it, honestly. One dude did like a 3-song set of 90s rap — “No Diggity” being the highlight.

We crushed some games and beers and moved onto another bar that I knew had cheap drinks. It just so happened that the terribles were also there. Thankfully they were too drunk to notice us so we skated by and had a few more beverages.

To end the night, we got Fergburger. It’s a Queenstown institution that usually has an insane line all the time. We got there and felt it was destiny because there wasn’t one. I heard a local walk past and say “Never seen that before,” in her amazing accent.

It’s tough to conclude whether the burgers are amazing or not under the circumstances. Regardless, it hit the spot and was a good way to conclude the evening.

The next day we had a summit to tackle. Depending.