First Impressions of Oz

It’s big. It’s hot. There are lots of people.

I flew into Melbourne and took the bus from the airport to the CBD. My hostel was in the thick of things — Flinders Street. I walked 1km to get there and was embarrassingly sweaty when I got to reception. It was 10am.

I dropped my bags off and looked for a quiet corner where I could lounge for a bit. I got less than 2 hours of sleep the previous night and didn’t sleep much on the plane.

After struggling with internet connectivity and keeping my eyes open, I found the TV lounge. An oasis. There were 3 levels of bean bag type chairs. Booyah. I sat down and put Horrible Bosses on. That movie is hilarious so, again, I didn’t sleep much. Then somebody came in and started No Country for Old Men.

By the time the movie marathon was done, I was able to check in. Thankfully, I drew a bottom bunk. It was in an 18 bed dorm. I honestly didn’t know you could fit that many beds in one room. It was real. And actually not that bad.

Partially because like 12 of those 18 people were attractive females. Something I noticed about Melbourne as a whole. So many attractive people. A combination of the amount of people and Melbourne being a popular destination for backpackers I guess. Fine by me.

I got my SIM card sorted out and nabbed some groceries. By the time I was situated, I was ready for a goodnight’s sleep.

I went down in the morning and was stoked to remember that this place had free pancakes, cereal and toast. So clutch. They also had free rice and pasta available any time. It was a real coup in the complimentary food department.

There’s this company that does free walking tours of the city each day. Choice. I missed the departure from the hostel but was able to rendezvous with them before it actually began. There was probably around 20 people or so in attendance. A surprising turnout.

Our guide, Nicole, took us through the cozy laneways, showing us the cool shops and street art. We went past the art gallery, Federation Square, the train station (where the phrase “meet you under the clocks” became popular), and several other arcades/malls.

Interesting tidbit: Melbourne was originally called “Batmania” after its founder. We also learned about the Ned Kelly gang who were Robin Hood-esque. I forget why that story was so influential. It was a 4 hour tour, so there was a lot of information being thrown about.

The tour disbanded and I did a lot more wandering on my way back. There was a free team zone that covered about a square kilometer of the CBD which made it easy to get around.

I relaxed for a bit when I got back to the hostel and made a decent dinner. Yes, it involved pasta. This was actually the first time I’d made pasta and sauce even though everybody pegs that as the quintessential backpackers meal.

I decided to take the advice of our tour guide and go to the Shrine of Remembrance to try and catch the sunset over the skyline of the city. It was a 20 minute walk from the hostel and a pretty nice vantage point. There was a tower I could’ve gone up but that junk cost money.

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The following day was somewhat lazy. I obviously capitalized on free pancakes. From there I went to a cafe and worked on some photos.

In the early afternoon, I did a hidden bar crawl with the same company that did the walking tour.

It was an interesting group. Two 20 year olds that barely knew what drinking was, a British couple that mostly kept to themselves, a dude from Minnesota, a miscellaneous Chilean and a chick who was working in New Zealand but originally from Charlottesville (an hour’s drive east from my house). Classic travel encounter.

To my relative disappointment, we weren’t really “uncovering hidden laneways bars” as the name of the crawl suggested. There weren’t any secret knocks or passwords to enter. The first stop was right off a main drag. That being said, the places did have a sweet divey feel.

First, we went to a whisky place where I ordered a Boilermaker. It’s the same as an RVA Happy Meal. For those who still don’t follow: it’s a shot and a beer. I chose the Australian variety, because when in Australia…

Apparently whisky and craft beer are really starting to catch on but there isn’t much supply so it’s all expensive. I think the bartender said Jack Daniel’s produces in 11 seconds what the entire Australian industry produces in a year. Yowzers.

Then we went to a converted shipping container (beer bar), a basement spot (cocktails) and an old brothel rooftop (cocktails).

Now that I’ve written that out, I suppose the places were decently unique.

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A few people elected to go to another area of the city and explore. It was time for my free pasta fill up though. I did have a night cap at the downstairs bar with a few people before calling it a night.

The next day, I checked out the National Galley of Victoria and the ACMI museum, which is an exhibit dedicated to moving images. I enjoyed Federation Square once more and walked along the Yarra River for a bit.

I decided I would create my own informal rooftop bar crawl that evening. I was attempting to find another good spot to catch the sunset.

Unfortunately, I set out too late and my first selection was only a 3-story roof that was dwarfed by high rises. It was still a really cozy spot. I had a quick beer and moved on.

The following place was really close by but I was having trouble finding it for some reason. I noticed two ladies having the same issue so I joined forces with them and we immediately located the door because it was right in front of us.

We rode the elevator together and chatted a bit. Then we were going to part ways once we got inside but they invited me to hang out with them. Sweet. They were also babes.

We had a really awesome chat. One was an American living in Melbourne and one was from Melbourne living in Seattle. Odd things. They were super nice and offered me a place to stay if ever I was in their cities again. They also bought my beers which was incredible.

I went to another hip spot where I had the opposite experience of talking to no one. Thems the breaks.

I got up early the next morning to catch a bus tour along the Great Ocean Rd. There were probably about 18 of us total. It was a full day thing and I was looking forward to seeing some sites.

First, we pulled over at the official sign marking the starting point. I mean, ok. It was a sign with predictable words on it. Nothing crazy. There were some decent views on the drive to our next stop. Again, somewhat similar to the California PCH, but with bluer water.

Next was a brief stop to interact with some wildlife. And it wasn’t really by choice. There were two types of parrots that were very keen to land on peoples’ heads and chill for a minute. There was also one koala sleeping way up in a tree. I saw its furry bum.

From there, we had a break for lunch in Apollo Bay. There wasn’t much view of the bay from where we were though. I chatted with a Dane, a German and a Brit.

Shortly after that, we did a brief nature walk in Mait Flats. There were some large trees and a slight concern about a poisonous black slug but I didn’t come across any. Seemed like kind of a pointless stop.

The next 3 were the main attractions anyway. There was two large rock formations in the ocean named Gog and Magog. I took the Gibson Steps to get a view from the beach as well.

Then there was the 12 Apostles, which are also rock structures in the ocean. It was a straight zoo of people though. By far the most touristy situation I’ve been in since leaving home. Kind of undesirable.

Finally, we were given just under an hour to explore Razorback, Shipwreck, Loch and Gorige. I hustled to see all of them cuz I was missing a good walk. I saved the best for last because I was able to actually dip my feet in the water. It felt nice.

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Overall, that was the highlight of the day. I was disappointed in all of the stops being insanely crowded with people. I wasn’t expecting that so it threw me off.

We had roughly a 3 hour drive back to Melbourne. The upside was that we got dropped off at the Queen Victoria Market, which just so happened to have a night market going on.

It was a large tent with a ton of food and craft vendors, bustling with people. The smells and styles were cool to take in. The city backdrop was quite nice as well.

I captured a few of the night scenes on my way back to the hostel. Then I packed up my stuff.

In the morning I checked out and boarded a 12 hour Greyhound to Sydney.